Wave your hands in the air like you just don’t care!
Fukin funee. Have you ever seen the sad ass reality show called “Cheaters”? A film crew spies on a partner suspected of cheating and arranges to film a meltdown bust in with all the parties involved. It’s pretty stupid, and thus famous. Cheaters is filmed here in Dallas.
Anyways, during this remodel that sees no end, we are looking for a short-term rental for Christine. So I went to look at this house for rent in my hood. Biek trash who answered the door looked *exactly* like me, ponytail, amused sneer and all. I said, “‘S’cuse what I am wearing, doood. I am remodeling my kitchen.” He said, “Uhmmm. Actually we are wearing the exact same thing. Come on in.” LOL I could tell when he opened the door that his bachelor pad was way too man-stinky for my baby. However. *Mofo sho had it going on*. Turns out he is the fucking producer of Cheaters! Hysterical. The whole show is fake, and he said he wouldn’t do it if the drama was real. There were all these fine babes hanging out and waiting to do a shoot. LOL His pad was like a fucking porn set. He was leaning back smug in his grimey office chair and I could tell he also thought his whole lowdown was a gotdam hoot. Getting paid. Hey-yullll.
Yeah. Suzi and lil’ Heaven are leaving me too! I will be all alone in the Shack (not the Love Shack no mo, not with Christine away). Just me and my hot plate. And little Charlotte who likes to play with chunks of plaster. I get damn near zoological when my wife is away, two steps away from howling at the moon. Last night I had mac n’ cheese and cornbread. It was gotdam good too. With the kitchen gone, I am way off my healthy wagon.
My handyman has done work at almost every house on the block, and the Desperate Housewives adore his tight little ass and peacock ways. Twice the gaggle of geese have gathered in front of my house just to twitter on about what an upstanding young man Angel is. Ohhhh, here he comes down the sidewalk carrying something heavy on his shoulder, jeans just so! Pfft. Angel is down with the ladies, my wife included. Ya see I been taking notes on how he do. Fucker.
Anyways. The kitchen and sunroom are coming along. Finally re-wired. No more cloth and tubes from the 20’s! Foundation repaired. Today is insulation and drywall day. I decided I might as well bust out the entire kitchen floor with a sledgehammer.It is just too heavy — four inches thick with cement from folks leveling all the floor for 80 years. The history of tile and linoluem in layers. I smell like my dad.
Back to rubble!
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